I have entered a new ring of hell


Ok people. I am convinced the zoo is evil. It is also one of my most favorite places in the world!

First, let’s meet part of my family.

See here’s the story. My mom married my step dad. Later they divorced after giving life to my little sister. He got remarried and helped create two of the most adorable little boys you have ever met: Tyler and Joe.

However, they are stupid (the parents not the babies) because they chose to have them LIKE A YEAR APART!

So Tyler is 2 and Joe is about to turn 1. These are the children I took to the zoo. Along with my sister, Carrigan, who is thankfully 14 and can take care of herself for the most part.

So here’s Joe at a ripe almost 1 years old…



And here is Tyler, at two years of age, trying to wave at the penguins which were by far his favorite animal of the day!



And of course Carrigan and I…



So here I am with my odd little family. We packed a lunch and went to the zoo cause it’s free after 2 on Tuesday!!!


I have been to the zoo plenty of times and everytime I conveniently forget how hot it is in that god forsaken place!

We. Walked. Everywhere.

Thankfully we had strollers. I do not even know how many calories I walked AND SWEATED off! I could calculate how many I walked, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. That would require me to push buttons and things. We cannot have that.

Another thing about the zoo, everything is expensive. We brought water and lunch but by the time we got sat down our water was like outside temperature, which was around 90 degrees. Not refreshing. So in an effort to save money my sister and I shared a drink. Normally I would go to my old standby, Diet Coke, because unlike Danielle I have not divorced my favorite diet soft drink (I don’t drink as much of it as she does either). But no, the zoo has Pepsi products. So we get Mountain Dew. Healthy, I know.

My lunch was healthy though.

So we walked around for 2 and a half hours in the heat, sweat all over, applied copious amounts of sunscreen to our pasty white skin, and died a little bit.

So here’s what I ate today in case anyone cares.


Breakfast: a relatively not so unhealthy scone, woo hoo. and COFFEE. I will never give up my coffee. You can’t make me!

Lunch: pimento cheese sandwich on my wonderful sandwich thins! Some stale tortilla chips. Some strawberries. A string cheese. I think that was it.

And dinner: I would have been better off with the cheese pizza Danielle was tempted with. Because I had Chinese. Apparently I am a terrible healthy eater according to the things I have posted so far on this blog.

However, I shall not give up! I will continue to shame myself by posting my unhealthy eating habits on the internet for the world to see!!!


PS. I left the doors to my house open because it was nice outside, now I am being eaten alive by little flying bugs. It’s like Willard, but with bugs instead of rats!

Day One! The beginning of the end!


So let’s talk about food.

But first! We need to talk about grandparents!

My Mema, I love her. Especially since I do not live with her any more. Now she comes over and helps me garden and we have nice little chats about the olden days with her late husband in the Navy. And that’s how this tale begins…

It was a bright sunny Monday morning. And Caitlin was planning on spending a nice enjoyable day with her Mema, doing a little laundry (since I don’t have my own washer). But noooooooo! Mema needed to go to the local naval base to renew her military ID. So off on our adventure we go. Early, without the proper amount of coffee in my system and no real breakfast.

This base is in the MIDDLE OF NOWHERE and it took like an hour to get there. We get on base and get lost. Can i make a request military? BIGGER SIGNS! So we got to have a nice little tour of the base while looking for the “building with the giant anchor out front” like the man at the front gate told us. However, what he did not say was that THERE IS A GIANT ANCHOR IN FRONT OF EVERY BUILDING ON THIS DAMN BASE!

The moral of this story is, the fewer giant anchors the better. Or learn how to give directions. Or get better signs!


Happy note, i got my sheets washed but I secretly forgot them on the clothes line out back and it has now dewed upon them.


So here’s what I ate today:


Breakfast: Not enough coffee and a cookie dough protein bar (by the way, it does not actually taste like cookie dough. It’s a cruel joke)

Lunch: A turkey and broccoli hot pocket and a salad.

Did you know they sell Olive Garden salad dressing in a bottle at the grocery store? It’s pretty amazing.

Snack time came next… it lasted for quite a while but started off strong.

First there was a kiwi strawberry smoothie.

Then a corn dog, with mustard of course. Because I LOVE CORNDOGS I DO NOT UNDERSTAND!

And a string cheese.

DInner: Skinny Broccoli Mac n Cheese with chicken in it. I got the recipe from this lovely lady over at skinnytaste

Then there was a scone.

So all in all I overnapped (it’s like oversleeping but in the afternoon) and missed my gym date with my mom. and I spent about 5 hours in the kitchen baking and making all kinds of goodies that y’all will get to hear all about later. And my sheets are still hanging outside.

But tomorrow is Zoo Day!

So go make some of that yummy food and have a delicious day fatty. I sure did. Sorta.